I Ran with Maud. Now what?

Hey friends.

A thought for today as we finish running the 2.23 miles in honor of Ahmaud Arbery. Tomorrow, after his birthday is over, there will still be work to be done in the way of justice and reconciliation. We all will need to make a key decision: Does our personal growth and formation stop at the end of that run? Or will we say “Yes” to being led into deeper waters?

A quick word to my white brothers and sisters, in love: Resist the urge to immediately reach out to your friends who are POC (people of color) to ask them to teach and guide you through this moment. This injustice is tiring and re-traumatizing for many. Worst fears have become realized - again - in Ahmaud’s murder. Now may not be the ideal time to ask for a history of race and systemic injustice from your brown and black friends.

Absolutely check on them. Tell them you see them. Lament with them and hear their pain, assuming they’re willing to share it. Then find other ways to learn. There are a plethora of helpful books, videos, and articles at our disposal. There are many creatives, pastors and thought leaders who do have the energy to offer invaluable perspectives and who are willingly leading and teaching us right now. Find those voices and discern which next step feels right for you.

Here’s one option below:

It’s a version of the ancient prayer practice of Examen, modified specifically for this moment. I led through the practice of Examen this past Wednesday night for our Mars Hill family. The Examen is an invitation for our true selves to be known, to receive encouragement and conviction, an opportunity to step into abundant life - all led by the Spirit of God. Perhaps the best place to start is here. With your own heart. See what God might reveal to you. Trust that He’s faithful to do it. Even if you don’t follow Christ, I hope these movements might still be useful in your own time of personal reflection.

To begin, find a comfortable position in a quiet space.

1. Ask for LIGHT. For God to illuminate this time and to give you a deeper understanding of His heart for His creation, for justice and reconciliation. Light reveals and it exposes. It clarifies and convicts. Ask for light as you lean into the next steps of this prayer time. (Psalm 139:23)

2. Give GRATITUDE. Thank God for who He is. That’s He’s the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. Thank him for the goodness and truth found in this work: that all are made in God’s image and likeness and deserving of dignity. That we’ve been given the ministry of reconciliation. That He is making all things new. That His justice is perfect and His grace and mercy abound and that He’s Lord over all. (Philippians 4:6)

3. Notice your EMOTIONS. What are your reactions to Ahmaud’s death and the larger history of racism and systemic injustice? Apathy, fear, anger, sadness, shame, guilt, paralysis? What might the Spirit of God be speaking to you (affirming or convicting) through these emotions? What next step is surfacing as a result? (Psalm 51:10)

4. CONFESS ways in which you’ve not loved God or others. Know that God’s grace and mercy are ready to receive you. Is there a personal apology that needs to be offered with sincerity? A courageous decision you’ve avoided that finally needs to be made? A policy or hiring practice in your company that needs to be righted? Is there a place you need to speak up where you’ve remained silent? Is there a place you need to be silent to allow God to speak? How have your own prejudices harmed others? Sit in the steadfastness of God’s love for you, knowing that it is His kindness that leads to repentance. (Psalm 139: 24, Romans 2:4)

5. ASK what you need for the future. Ask God for courage, integrity, strength and discernment as you take practical next steps in the work of reconciliation and justice. Ask for what you need to be undone or repaired in you. Ask for direction as you seek resources and wisdom from others. Perhaps specifically ask for one person to come to mind. Ask for boldness as you call out injustices with both grace and truth. Ask for a heart that sees people as God does, a heart that humbly rejects apathy and defensiveness as you continue this holy work. (Matthew 7:7-11)

I don’t know what your next step might be. It may look like signing a petition or sharing a post. But it also might be passing the mic to an underrepresented voice in your sphere of influence. It might be saying “No, not ok” to a racist comment made by a family member or neighbor and risking the discomfort. It might be evaluating your version of charity and re-orienting whose stories take center stage in those efforts. It might be looking at how many POC voices you’re learning from in the books you read or the people you follow on social media. It might be looking at your neighborhood or your kids’ school to lean into the harder questions concerning how and why those communities were specifically formed - and for whom.

Here’s the punchline: We won’t come up with all the answers on our own. I’m resisting the urge to create an exhaustive list for all the things we should be doing right now - because I trust the Spirit of God more than my own wisdom. My work is to speak and lead in a way that tells the truth and honors the Kingdom of God. It’s to build bridges. But that’s my work. Yours might look different. You may be starting from a different point.

But we all have work to do. The realization of healing and restorative justice cannot happen on the backs of people of color alone. It’s too hard of a burden to carry - trust me.

So if it’s helpful accountability, leave a comment on how you’re being led in this work. Let us know how you lean and how it goes. I cannot promise to have all the answers or wisdom anyway, as mine is a singular perspective. But I can commit to prayer.

Grace and peace to you on the journey. May we lace up our running shoes - whatever that means for you - tomorrow and again and again - for His glory and the ultimate prize of the very best Good News of Jesus Christ.

Amen.

Ashlee Eiland